


The Reason for Norway (part 55)

by simonsrosebud



Series: Soft Rains Media AU one shots [2]
Category: Carry On Series - Rainbow Rowell
Genre: Love, Lucy Salisbury - Freeform, M/M, Sad with a Happy Ending, Social Media AU, Soft rains, Traveling, Tumblr, U all already know the story if you've been following along, Visiting Lucy's grave, basilton grimm-pitch - Freeform, i guess?, look no one gets hurt so, simon snow salisbury
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-12
Updated: 2020-02-12
Packaged: 2021-02-27 21:48:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,102
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22672822
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/simonsrosebud/pseuds/simonsrosebud
Summary: On Simon and Baz’s trip through Europe, their stop in Norway has more intention than just seeing the views.  Buried out in the country lies Simon’s biological mother, Lucy Salisbury, and it’s finally time he met her.
Relationships: Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch/Simon Snow
Series: Soft Rains Media AU one shots [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1670683
Kudos: 27





	The Reason for Norway (part 55)

**SIMON**

I climbed onto all fours above Baz. “If I wasn’t so tired I’d entertain you.” I kissed him despite the obvious scoff he tried getting out.

“Idiot.” He pushed my shoulder and rolled his eyes. I fell to the side of him and wrapped an arm around his waist to pull him to me. 

“Love you,” I say.

_ I want this forever _ .

**BAZ**

Staring at Simon was one thing. He was all tan skin and scattered freckles and sunshine smiles. But it was another thing to have him stare right back with just as much awe.

And another to have him pull you close.

And another to have him kiss you so soft that you’d think he was afraid of breaking you. I don’t think he could even if he wanted to. 

Simon Snow was too good for me, surely.

“I love you,” I told him. He smiled and snuggled his face into my neck.

“Thank you for everything.”

* * *

Simon was a nervous wreck the next morning. I mean, I get it. More than some others. Going to my mother's tomb, no matter how many times I've gone, never gets easier. I can’t imagine going to meet your mother for the first time in twenty years and the only thing that’s there to meet is her grave.

And as much as I may say if life didn’t turn out like this then maybe we wouldn’t have found each other, Simon is the one person on this earth that never deserved this outcome. Thank bloody hell that Ebb came into his life. She may have just saved him.

I raise my fist to knock on the toilet door, but grab my mobile instead:

Baz: _You alright in there?_

Simon: _no_

Simon: _panicking_

Simon: _don’t know if i can go thru w it_

Simon: _i want to_

Simon: _i need to_

Simon: _no i can do this_

Baz: _We have all day, Simon. Do you need a few more minutes?_

Simon: ... _yes please?_

Simon: _can u come in here?_

Simon: _i need u_

**BAZ**

Simon was sitting on the ground with his back against the wall. He looked up when I walked in, but instead of waiting and motioning for me to join him he was up and crashing into me faster than I could process.

I wrapped my arms around him and held the back of his head. “It’s alright.” I kissed the side of his head. _Was this a bad idea?_

“I’m just scared,” he whispered. His forehead pressed against my neck. “It’s stupid.”

“No, it’s not.” I pressed my fingers into his hair. “It’s not. My mother's grave is still the hardest thing for me to face, some days.”

He took a deep breath, but didn’t say anything else. That was okay. I wasn’t expecting him to say anything at all, if I was honest.

It took him a bit to calm down, but once we got on the road his knee wouldn’t stop bouncing and his fingers drummed against the center console the whole drive. I slid my hand under his so he could drum against my palm. Instead he slid his fingers through mine and held on.

I walked Simon over to her, Lucy Salisbury’s, grave and helped clear away some leaves and grown in grass, but then retreated away a good bit to give him some space. If he wanted me to stay I would have, but he didn’t speak a word as I walked away. It felt too personal. I may have brought him there, but it wasn’t my place.

My heart shattered when he sank to his knees and pressed a hand to the stone.

**SIMON**

I expected it to be cold, but the stone of her grave was warm from the sun when I pressed my hand against it. _Am I supposed to talk to her? Should I?_

It didn’t feel real, now that I was there. Her name was there. _My_ name was there, too. I think that’s what made me cry. I didn’t even try to stop it. I didn’t care who saw it, either. _Where was Baz?_

**Gracious daughter, friend, and mother.**

**“Simon, my heart is always yours, my rosebud boy.”**

_This is where you’ve been all these years, mother? You weren’t even Norweigan, so why here? Did anyone besides Dad know? Where is it that you stayed when you-_ **_we_ ** _lived here? Where is the rest of your family?_ **_My_ ** _family?_

“Hi,” I said. I felt stupid talking to myself, but Baz had said he sometimes did it to his mother.

“I don’t know what to say.” I pulled my knees to my chest. “I’m Simon, your uh, your son… Um… I wish you were here,” I whispered and dropped my forehead against my knees. “I wish I knew you.” I dragged my fingers against the grave. “Dad told me good things about you, once. Gave me pictures of you and me.”

_This shouldn’t be so hard._

“Said he gave me up to the system a year or so after you died. I bounced around homes until Ebb got me. She’s my mum… Besides you, I guess.”

I wiped my eye on my sleeve. “I'm in school. Got myself someone. He's real good, you know. Calls me rosebud boy, too. Hopefully you don't mind, but he's the only one who ever has… besides you.” _Stop tearing._ “Think I'm gonna keep him for good.” I took a deep breath. “This is so hard. For so long I wished that you and Dad would come back for me and take me back. I wanted to know who you were so bad, what you were like, what similarities we had. And-And then-” I took a deep breath. My hands were shaking. I didn't really know why I was crying, but my vision was wet with hot tears. 

Baz returned down beside me and pulled me close, and it was too hard not to cry. “I-I didn’t even know her.” Baz pulled my head into his neck.

“I know. That’s okay,” he said. “That's okay.”

I gripped his sleeve.

**BAZ**

Seeing Simon in a state that I'd been in plenty of times before was harsh. I tried giving him his privacy, but once I saw him red faced and crying I nearly bolted to sit down next to him.

He gripped my sleeve and closed his eyes. “Please stay.”

“I'm not going anywhere, Si,” I said and kissed his head.

He slid his hand in mine. It was quiet, and whether I was supposed to hear it or not, he mumbled. “Stay for good.”


End file.
